The Greenwood Side

Writer's Block: As the Cookie Crumbles

Sun, 06 Sep 2009 05:19:12 GMT

If you ran the fortune cookie factory, what message would you make sure gets put in a cookie?

The cookie is a lie!

Thu, 12 Jun 2008 02:40:47 GMT

1 - Go to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random
The first random Wikipedia article you get is the name of your band.

2 - Go to Random quotations: http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3
The last four words of the very last quote of the page is the title of your first album.

If you want to do this again, you'll hit refresh to generate new quotes, because clicking the quotes link again will just give you the same quotes over and over again.

3 - Go to flickr's "explore the last seven days" http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days/
Third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

Put it all together, that's your debut album.

Verdelot

By a Love Story

Sat, 02 Feb 2008 00:56:13 GMT

If you read this, if your eyes are passing over this right now, (even if we don't speak often) please post a comment with a COMPLETELY MADE UP AND FICTIONAL memory of you and me. It can be anything you want - good or bad - BUT IT HAS TO BE FAKE. When you're finished, post this little paragraph in your journal and be surprised (or mortified) about what people DON'T ACTUALLY remember about you.

Sun, 27 Jan 2008 01:42:37 GMT

A while back, in the wee hours of the the morning, I was inspired to write this poem by an article I read on Everything2.com about bad teenage poetry.

MY Soul AKes lke an atomic BOMb

Life. What is life!!!
What is hope? Is there hope in coffee spoons?
My life has potential. E=mc2
Boom!!! Anger, outflowing rage!!
I can’t take it any more!
Why is my life so awful!!
I have a monkey on back and a devil in my brain!
Nuclear war! Prior knowledge! Reptillians!
Dnt B sch A reptile! Leev me alone!
0my head!! What is life?
He who has ears, let him here?
Here, here!
Evil is real!
Now we see the violence inherent in the system!
#$^*@
Insane! Insane!! Monkey gonads cure all disease. Only $5.99 for
New LIFE. PLASTIC ARTIfical @%$#(@. Gondor
Ash gnash Ron Paul.
Please take your medication.
O.K.

I also have a parody of "The Impossible Dream (The Quest) " from the musical Man of La Mancha. The song is written in the persona of George W. Bush.

The Neocon Dream

To dream... the Neocon dream
To fight... the Islamist foe
To send... our American soldiers

To lands... where the French dare not go
To right... all the wrongs of the world
To find... them dubyaMDs
To try... when the public's against it
To win... the war in Iraq...

This is my quest, to stayy the course...
No matter how hopeless,no matter how hard...
To fight for the right, without question or pause...
To be willing to fall in the polls for a righteous cause...

And I know if I'll only be true to this glorious quest,
That Iraq will lie peaceful and free,
When I'm laid to my rest...
And the world will be better for this:
George Bush, scorned and covered with scars,
Still strove, with his last ounce of courage,
To free... the Middle East...

Wikipedia Music Meme

Thu, 13 Dec 2007 00:52:48 GMT

Rules: Go to the Wikipedia home page and click random article. That is your band's name. Click random article again; that is your album name. Click random article 15 more times; those are the tracks on your album.

Band name: Sharon Ebanks

Album name: Walter Poppe

1. Kåre Willoch
2. Carrie Snowden
3. USS Wasp (CV-7)
4. Valley Gardens Middle School
5. Gare d'Orsay
6. Margaret Haile
7. Silvio Adzic
8. Jaime Sommers (Bionic Woman)
9. Flex dollar
10. Soveria Mannelli
11. Ayyavazhi beliefs
12. Lance Russell
13. New Jersey Department Of Human Services Police
14. Jordan Crane (rugby player)
15. List of birds of Suriname

Sharon Ebanks is a bluesy rock/rapcore/barbershop band from Keyser, West Virginia. It was named after a lady I unsuccessfully tried to sell a singing toaster to. Mike "Cracker" McLowsky is our white rapper and electric bass guitarist. Kevin "Saurkraut" Kislow is our electric guitarist and rock vocalist. Brad "Barbershop" Cutter is our quartet leader, acoustic guitarist, sometime kazoo player, and ~~propaganda~~ media man. I am the death metal growler and web guru. Our mission is to bring ~~mishmash~~ genre bending music to the masses. Our album is named after my 7th grade English teacher, who was prematurely bald and who used to be a plumber. He tried to be cool, but failed miserably. Our best track is Valley Gardens Middle School, a bitterly sarcastic and ironic tribute to the prison we attended. Everything jelled, the barbershop style harmony at the beginning, Kevin's soulful singing and funky guitar playing, my growling and roaring, and Mike's rapping his and his 4 minute raging bass guitar solo at the end. Silvio Adzic is the tragic story of a brilliant German inventor who sold out to Hitler, but died in a freak wine bottle accident before he could invent a dog powered death ray, and is our one hit. It played on a local radio station for 3 days before listener complaints ended our moment of glory. Our band split up soon after our album was released. Mike went away to Mississippi State University, where he majored in Agriculture. Kevin moved to Germany, and became an English teacher. Rumour has it he's drunk half the time. I blame all them German beer gardens for his pitiable state. Brad now works at an ad agency. I'll betcha he's rich now.

Fri, 28 Sep 2007 17:23:17 GMT

Happy Birthday, firefoot_1428

Fri, 14 Sep 2007 03:07:20 GMT

Happy Birthday, roa_aoife!

Lolcandidate

Sun, 12 Aug 2007 05:24:27 GMT

You probably know what an lolcat is. It's a picture of a cat with humorous writing on it. I saw a variant on the idea in someone's Livejournal, the lolcandidate. It was a jab at Dennis Kucinich. Here is my work, an altered picture of Ron Paul, the most maverick Republican presidential candidate:

He opposes the war in Iraq and wants to actually end most government programs. You can find out more by going to Wikipedia's page on him. In other news, I got a B in ENG 112, as I expected.

School's done, for now.

Wed, 01 Aug 2007 22:02:28 GMT

I finished the summer semester of college today, but I'll start school again on the 20th, so I don't have much of a break. My greatest triumph during this semester was winning 100 bonus points for our group's presentation on GMO's. After a bit of prompting by one of our group's members, I wrote a parody of "The Phantom of the Opera" called "The Spectre of the GMOs." I have been told it was a riot. I crouched behind the sink/desk at the front of the class and used an empty bag of corn as a puppet. The two other members of my group started out with a little interpretive dance while my puppet bopped along to the music. Unfortunately, we had had so much trouble trying to synchronize our singing to a karaoke version of "The Phantom of the Opera" when we were practicing that we ended up using a version of the song with singing. For the ending part of the song, I took the bag off my hand, stood up and played a protest leader. We all had fun, and our audience enjoyed it, including our teacher, who had offered 100 bonus points to the most creative presentation. Today, I took my final exam in College Composition II, i.e. ENG 112. I think I got almost all or all of the nonessay questions correct, but I think I only did a poor job on the essay portion of the test. I did better on my research paper on William Faulkner than I expected. I got 86% instead of the C that I had expected. All in all, I think I'll get a B for ENG 112. I discovered some good stories and poems during the class, including "A Rose for Emily" by William Faulkner, and "Dulcet est Decorum Est" by Wilfred Owen.

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